As the air cools and the holidays approach, the urge to begin planning arises — flights, gifts, and decorations become priorities. You love celebrating this time of year with family, but you’re worried your children will be glued to their screens. The season is important to you as a way to spend time with those you love. To help your child understand this, here are five tips to encourage them to be more present during the holidays.
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1. Regulate Device and Internet Access
Phones, especially for children and teenagers, provide a convenient distraction when in an uncomfortable or unstimulating situation. It’s only natural that a child will gravitate toward this distraction, so regulating device usage is a good idea.
In case you already do so, and existing limits aren’t helping, you might want to institute special rules for the holidays. During events involving immediate and/or extended family, for instance, you can put away kids’ devices for the duration.
If you prefer to set less firm rules, you can also take advantage of parental controls on such devices. There are even child-specific phones on the market with social media and internet restrictions built in from the start. These types of kids phones are perfect for letting kids stay in touch while lessening potential distraction in any situation. You can also trust these devices to keep kids safe from internet harm in general.
2. Engage Them in Hands-On Activities
Our focus inevitably shifts toward things that stimulate us the most in each moment, which is why screens draw us. Nevertheless, being present with family at the holidays — while occasionally unexciting for kids — is still important.
In order to help your child enjoy the season, engage them in home activities that celebrate and encourage holiday cheer. You can introduce recipes, games, and crafts from your family tradition, help preserve them, and build lasting memories.
Making holiday treats with your children and including them in the cooking process for events is a great start. Not only are they doing something productive, but they also get to play a more direct part in the celebrations. Food is a draw at any age and builds a memorable sensory relationship between festive foods and the holiday season. In addition, any kind of arts and crafts activity (like making ornaments or decorating place mats) will surely excite younger children.
3. Go on Festive, Tech-Limited Outings
Leaving the house for festive activities is another effective way to keep your children present (especially combined with device rules). No matter where you live, there are always holiday events being held nearby to explore. Markets and fairs have amazing food to taste and rides to ride; farms offer Christmas trees and rustic gifts. Outsized light displays will dazzle your kids more than any screen ever could.
Seek out fun outdoor activities where you might find that you won’t even need to set limits. Your kid will find it hard to look at your phone as they’re dragging their toboggan back up the hill! Should their devices come back out around the bonfire, though, feel free to reinstate limits as needed.
If your child has a kids phone that prevents internet access, you can allow them to bring it along without fear of distraction. If not, then perhaps the day can be considered “tech-limited” and devices restricted while you all enjoy the festivities. Even moderate restrictions can make the difference between truly experiencing the day and missing out.
4. Explain the Importance of the Holidays
The issue of your child being distracted can sometimes be chalked up to a simple lack of understanding. The younger they are, the more likely it is that they are focused on themselves and instant gratification.
Whether the holidays are a time of religious observance or just family togetherness for you, teach your child why it’s important to be present. Be honest and respectful, and explain everything they don’t understand. If you’re part of a faith tradition, activities and resources at your house of worship can underscore your message.
Don’t forget to ask yourself why holidays are important to you as a person and to your extended family. They are, after all, a time for bonding, so it can be helpful to discuss that with your children. In the event your child doesn’t intrinsically enjoy the holidays, they’ll know they need to be there for you and everyone else.
5. Be a Good Role Model
Finally, the most important tip of all is to show them how it’s done. Your children will learn from your actions, so set as good an example as you can. If you arrange a family baking activity but spend the entire time prepping your Instagram post, they’re unlikely to learn anything. As their parent, you need to be just as present as you want your children to be.
You might even find it helpful to restrict your own device usage if you have trouble staying in the moment. One option, for example, is to turn on airplane mode (while allowing texts and calls through). Imposing these rules upon yourself is a valid and productive solution, and ultimately you’ll be glad you did it. The goal is to spend holiday time with your children, and you will not regret doing so.
Technology can’t be avoided, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. But when it comes time to celebrate the season, it’s easiest to be present when the devices go away. These tips will help ensure that fun times can be had with the whole family. In the end, you’ll be grateful that everyone got to bond as much as they did.